Josh Has Adventures

Here are things I did last week:

• Shot a Vikings commercial. More accurately, I moved a couch for six hours, and occasionally, people took pictures of it. During my time in LA, I held multiple a PA job wherein my specific duties were to move couches, because the more power you yield on a filmshoot, the less heavy shit you have to pick up. I finally get in front of the camera, and it's back to couch moving. Just goes to show you...something....I guess.

• Had my teeth cleaned. Then I was convinced I should have my wisdom teeth out, because leaving them leads to Tooth Aids. I then whined and fretted and whined and cried and whined and RAGED and whined. Then, at the last possible minute, the oral surgeon was unable to see me. I then started whining about that. Next week, I'll be whining about the Tooth Aids.

• In the company of Ms. Lauren Anderson (NAME DROPPED!), rode all the rides at Camp Nickelodeon. There were fairly odd coasters, a steep plunge from the top of the MOA roof (Which had footprints on it! Why!?! What possible reason could there be?!), and a broken blaster making me incapable of blasting all the ghosts. Lauren's blaster was not broken. Then, as I attempted to flip a penny into the wishing pond, it flew in every direction but the pond. That penny was broken too.

• Attended my first bonfire of the year. I then met up with the boys for a movie, and I still smelled like bonfire. There should be a cologne. We'll call it BONFIRE! Or, you know, just go to a bonfire and don't shower afterwards.

• Kicked off the Summer Movie Season. Here's what I thought of these movies:

WOLVERINE: You want to know what Wolverine did before we met him in X-Men? He screamed. About everything and anything. Dead girlfriend? Scream. Step-brother tries to kill him? Scream. Puts a decimal point in the wrong spot, now he has to do that all over again? Scream. And the claws looked like ass. You fail Hugh Jackman.

GHOSTS OF GIRLFRIEND'S PAST: First, shut the hell up. Secondly, romantic comedies can be fun and enjoyable. You know they are, and if you disagree with me, how do you explain that lost Sunday afternoon with back-to-back-to-back Sandra Bullock's on TBS' Movie and a Makeover? Yeah, that's right. I saw you watching it! Even Two Weeks Notice! You watched Two Weeks Notice! Sandara Bullock has never even seen Two Weeks Notice! Finally, this movie, the one where Scrooge can't stop humping everyone* - viewed with the bar set so low it was actually underground - was ass. Complete and total ass. It was an extremely well-cast final project in some godawful "Intro to Filmmaking" course at the Learning Annex. You fail Matthew McCoughnawhatever.

STAR TREK: I have never given a shit about anything Star Trek. So I had nothing riding on this movie. That being said, I enjoyed myself immensely. It was fun, funny, extremely well-cast, and a tad ingenious in it's ability to be both a prequel and sequel. You win JJ Abrams. You win.

And now it's Monday. What new adventures await me? I don't know, but I'll bet there's a dragon.

*Now THAT'S a movie!